Platonic Relationships And How To Keep It That Way

Jason and Mary have decided to be friends and it is their desire to remain just friends -platonic.

But some how, things begin to cook along the way, emotions begin to rise, feelings begin to come alive. One is feeling all giddy but the other person doesn’t feel the same way. “How do I contain myself?” Jason says. “Oh my! Mary would be so disappointed in me! She trusts me so much! I am going to let her down! what do I do?”

Mary senses a whiff of floating feelings from him with the excessive love and affection Jason has been to showing her lately. “What is Jason trying to do?” Is he falling in love with me? No, it can’t be. This can’t be! We are just friends! Okay, I need to keep calm. After all, he hasn’t said anything!”

Jason also can’t seem to control his emotions any more. “I just have to tell her, I just need to let her know how I feel! Why should I torture myself in silence?”

He goes ahead to say how he feels and Mary thinks to herself: “oh no! how did we get here! “We can only remain friends and nothing more”. “I’m sorry, this can’t be possible” she says. Jason goes away, heart broken.

Related: How To Navigate The Friendzone

Does this sound too familiar?

Sometimes, in close relationships which start out as non- romantic, we allow our emotions get a hold of us and entangle ourselves in things we never envisaged or thought of from the beginning.

We however, need to be able to manage our friendships in ways that will not jeopardize the very reason we started out on the journey in the first place. To avoid some of these issues, these are some practical steps you can take to ensure your friendship stands the test of time:

1. Define your relationship from the outset if you choose to have it platonic

Before you take off as being friends, be sure to communicate (it doesn’t have to be verbal) that you are just friends and nothing more.

It could be so hard for two people especially opposites not to attract and you may think this thing you both have going on is just platonic but you just may never know.

However, if you find yourself in a situation where you want to take your friendship to another level, be sure the other person could reconsider the definition of your friendship before you fan up a flame you cannot easily put out and get yourself burned in the process.

2. Set boundaries for your platonic relationship

If you have a platonic relationship and want to maintain it that way, you need to set boundaries for yourselves.

A platonic relationship or friendship is exactly what it is, platonic. No form of erotic or sexual pleasures and you don’t have to paint a false picture of what is actually going on either to yourself or to friends and family.

If people begin to think or tease that you have something intimate going on, you both first need to check if you are doing anything that sets off that kind of thought process in their minds and adjust accordingly.

If you are not a couple, don’t portray yourselves as one.

3. Make up your mind before hand on what the relationship is all about and be firm about it

While in the relationship is not the time to decide if it’s platonic and whether it will remain so. If it’s your aim and desire for the relationship to be platonic, you need to have solidified that in your heart before going neck deep into the friendship.

It’s easier to navigate your friendship when your mind is made up from the start and it also helps you handle things better without any guilt.

4. Don’t put yourselves in compromising situations if you are in a platonic relationship

Don’t be alone in private places where there are no third parties if you are in a platonic relationship.

Being together so closely or doing something that you will feel embarrassed about if someone else sees you doing, is not a place you want to be.

If you say what you have is platonic and you want to maintain it that way, you need to avoid those things. Such compromising positions only reduces the value of your friendship and also decreases your own self worth in your own eyes.

5. Communicate it

Once you are in the friendship and begin to notice some special endearment and extra special feelings or actions towards you by your friend, take notice of these things and don’t ignore the signals before you.

If you are not interested in taking your friendship further than it currently is, say so and nip it in the bud immediately.

6. Don’t Pretend

Let your friend know where you stand. Do not lead him or her on. Don’t pretend and keep taking in all of the extra attention. Ask questions if need be.

Have you ever found yourself in such a situation? How did you handle it? Let me know in the comments.

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