Have you ever felt used by some one you went out of your way to help?
Many times people are needy and what they need is people not things. At that time or season of their lives, they would do anything to get your attention to get whatever it is they want.
Does that sound too familiar?
You go out of way to satisfy their needs and they either go away happily or decide to hang around you for more.
Nothing wrong with that-if you can afford it.
The problem however begins when at some point, you begin to see some changes, not towards the thing but towards you.
You wonder what just happened and if you had done anything wrong either by helping or in the things you said or in the way you behave.
Nope, after the self check, you discover it’s not you. It’s them.
This makes you sad and keeps you up till late at night trying to think of ways to make things better but you find out that it’s actually beyond you and there’s little or nothing you can do.
But at the same time, you know you need to be doubly sure about what’s going on. Are you getting the message correctly or are you just imagining things?
12 Signs That Show You Are Being Used
1. After the person receives whatever he or she needs, they act like it’s nothing.
2. They make you feel uncomfortable for helping.
3. They make you question if you did the right thing by helping.
4. They feel since they already got what they want, every other thing doesn’t matter. In other words, they feel they would most likely not need anything from you next time (which is not true).
5. They make you feel redundant. Some are really good at that.
6. They tell others what you did for them is nothing.
7. They act the way they act and then try to put you on a guilt trip as if you did something wrong and it’s your fault.
8. They say to you that they could have done it themselves or gotten the help they got from you elsewhere (yet they came to you).
9. They would want to hijack your life and make you feel small because they are too arrogant to acknowledge the help they received from you.
10. They tell you they can repay you back what you gave to them.
11. They abandon ship when you need a helping hand.
12. They leave only to show up when they need your help again.
Sad but true.
Now That You Know These Signs, How Do You Handle it…?
If you have found yourself in this situation, you are most likely unhappy things went awry with your friends or family depending on the peculiarity of your situation.
May be you are full of regrets or you are tempted to back off not just helping who it is currently, but have also vowed not to lend out a helping hand to others as well.
These are normal reactions when you are taken aback or caught off guard because what transpired, is something you never saw coming.
However, don’t let these things discourage you from helping the next person that comes your way if you have the means to do so.
People are different and you should understand that you may not be appreciated all of the time.
Regardless of what happens, what might have happened to you in the past or what is happening right now, remember you have sown a good seed and you will reap its benefits despite the way you are being treated by friends, family or even total strangers.
Take the lessons you feel you have gained and use it to your own advantage next time. Continue to be yourself and show love to all you can. Your labor of love will not be in vain.
Don’t worry, you will be just fine.
Have you ever been in this situation? Please feel free to leave your comments.
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