Look before you “speak”…
There’s so much that goes on in the mind that the mouth tends to express but should everything that comes to mind be said out loud? The words we speak goes a long way to affect the people who hear them either positively or negatively. The fact that so much importance is placed on our words, tells us we need to take care of what comes out of our mouths.
So what are the things to consider before you speak? You need to be conscious of these 5 major things before you indulge in an exercise of verbal self expression:
1. To whom you speak:
Who are you talking to? Someone who would pull you up or tear you down? Are the words you hear edifying and do the ones you speak to others edifying too? How much influence does it wield on you and how much impact does it have on your life or those of others? You need to be mindful of whom you talk to and the kind of counsel you receive. This one is very important. Bad counsel can lead to life long regrets.
Related: How To Handle Peer Pressure
2. of whom you speak:
Who or what are you talking about? Are the contents of what you express soul worthy or cringe worthy? When you leave that conversation how do you feel? Better or worse off? There are some conversations that are particularly draining by the time you are done. Does your listener (or may be you) wish you never had that conversation?
3. How you speak:
How do you express your opinion or thoughts to others? Calmly, rudely or you just don’t care how it is received? What impression do you leave in the hearts of those you speak to? Don’t forget people might not remember your exact words but they would certainly not forget how the delivery of your words made them feel.
Related: 3 Questions To Ask To Increase Your Productivity
4. When to speak :
Are your words coming out at the right time? Is your spouse, child or friend in the best position to receive that criticism you have to say? Are you looking out for the best time when what you have to say would be received gracefully? Always ask yourself: “When is a good time to have this discussion or when is the best time to say what I have to say?”
5. Where to speak:
Not only is the timing of your words important but the place is also as important as well. Would what you have to say better be said in private rather than in public? Would after the meeting be good? Would it be better to have that discussion over lunch? Be mindful of the place where you have your discussions. If the other person doesn’t find it comfortable, look for another avenue or place where you can have the conversation without any form of vulnerability or exposure.
The rule of thumb is to ask: Are my words true? Are my words kind? Are my words agreeable to the ear?
Enjoy!
